It's on! At halftime of the men's basketball game on Wednesday, Feb. 22, employees from GCU's Peoria site will take on their counterparts from Tempe. The Peoria Pride -- that's the name they have adopted for the occasion -- decided to circulate their player profiles in advance of the epic showdown, and here they are (complete with a little trash talking):
● JAMES JACKSON
Hometown: Fresno, Calif.
What he does at GCU: Helps counselors learn and develop.
Favorite basketball player: Kobe Bryant.
Basketball ability: I’m the oldest on the team.
On Tempe’s chances: Zero. Speed kills!
● STEPHEN FRANKE
Hometown: Phoenix.
What he does at GCU: Enrollment manager.
Favorite basketball player: David Robinson.
Basketball ability: I am built like a steamroller, but unfortunately I have the body of a 50-year-old.
On Tempe’s chances: I try to encourage everyone, but the Tempe team should be playing bridge instead of basketball.
● JESSICA BROWN
Hometown: Killeen, Texas.
What she does at GCU: Finance counselor for KBCOB.
Favorite basketball player: Ray Allen.
Basketball ability: Team player, motivator, hustles to the end.
On Tempe’s chances: Losing is not an option for me. In it to win it!
● LUKE EYRISE
Hometown: Brookfield, Wis.
What he does at GCU: I change lives daily as an enrollment counselor for Campus 7.
Favorite basketball player: Toni Kukoc.
Basketball ability: They call me “The Janitor” because I clean up — and usually come in for mop-up duty.
On Tempe’s chances: Even if Tim Tebow and divine intervention were on their side, they would not win.
● KOLBY JONES
Hometown: Chicago.
What he does at GCU: Enrollment manager.
Favorite basketball player: Michael Jordan.
Basketball ability: A raging bull — if the bull were blind, had a bad ankle, was slow on defense and had an inconsistent jump shot.
On Tempe’s chances: Will win only if Peoria has car trouble on the way to the game.
● MIKE McFADDEN
Hometown: Phoenix.
What he does at GCU: Enrollment manager for College of Christian Studies.
Favorite basketball player: Steve Nash.
Basketball ability: Like a cheetah in the ocean (looks fast but isn’t).
On Tempe’s chances: The same as me going to the NBA.
● NOAH GERKIN
Hometown: Phoenix.
What he does at GCU: Enrollment manager for KBCOB.
Favorite basketball player: Michael Jordan.
Basketball ability: Definitely possibly maybe good or bad.
On Tempe’s chances: A win for them would be scoring one basket. So … 50-50.
● GLEN ELLIS
Hometown: Phoenix.
What he does at GCU: Enrollment manager, Campus 6. I help change the lives of people who change the lives of students.
Favorite basketball player: Michael Jordan.
Basketball ability: Jackie Moon on offense, Cable Guy on defense.
On Tempe’s chances: Not too bad. We’re giving them one point for each time they hit the rim or backboard!
● JAMIE FREY
Hometown: Bethlehem, Pa.
What she does at GCU: Enrollment counselor for CONHS.
Favorite basketball player: Michael Jordan.
Basketball ability: Can hang with the boys (former NCAA Division II player). Quick release on shot plus an understanding of the game.
On Tempe’s chances: Slim to none. Peoria has talent, maturity, intellect and skill.
● REGGIE ALFONSO
Hometown: Phoenix.
What he does at GCU: Regional director of operations.
Favorite basketball player: Allen Iverson.
Basketball ability: Scoring guard who hates to get scored on.
On Tempe’s chances: Could be a very embarrassing night for our Tempe counterparts.
● DAVID GONZALES
Hometown: I’m a Martian.
What he does for GCU: What don’t I do?
Favorite basketball player: Allen Iverson.
Basketball ability: A step below the waterboy’s.
On Tempe’s chances: About as good as mine of winning the lottery (and I don’t play). Would a Ford Tempo beat a Dodge Viper?
● MONTAE McFARLAND
Hometown: Los Angeles.
What he does for GCU: Enrollment manager.
Favorite basketball player: Kobe Bryant.
Basketball ability: Smart and sneaky.
On Tempe’s chances: Great — as long as we show up on Feb. 23 instead of Feb. 22.